Ask Max Monday: Tiny Bubbles…In The Bath…

February 18, 2013 |

Ask Max Monday

Deer Max – The mom lady person thinks ME is weerd. When she is in the bath tub ME likes to drink the water and eat the bubblies in there. ME says it’s normal. Is it or is ME just weerd like the mom lady person says. – Yore friend Billy

Dood…it’s a little bit weird. Not the drinking of the water, all kitties need water and hey, why not get it while there’s a bunch of it available? But the eating of the bubbles? That’s kind of odd. Not in a BAD way—it just makes you a little…special. So ignore her when she says you’re weird. You’re just enjoying some People Soup, that’s all.

You are so smart, witty, and wise! How did you ever get it all into one kitty? Amazing!

I watch TV. They tell you a lot on that thing, especially on those Videos of Stupid People Doing Stupid Things shows. You really get to know how peoples’ brains work watching that. Oh, and I read a lot. Because reading is fun and mental. Or something like that.

Oh my gosh, Max! There is a little gray kitten stuck in the bathroom mirror. He is there every time I check and he likes to play patty cake but he’s no good with hide ‘n seek. I told my brother about this and so he went to check. He say I’m dumb because it isn’t a gray kitten. He says it is a gray and white kitten! But I say he is dumb because that kitten is gray! Who is right?

All right, dood, I went and checked, and you’re both wrong. It’s a black and white kitty, and he is SUPER HANDSOME. Maybe it’s time for you guys to go to the stabby place and get your eyes checked?

Max,
I love your new cover and the title of the book. And you picture on the cover is beautiful. Be I’m worried. You look really thin next to the book photo. Is something wrong?
Concerned Luna

No worries, Luna…It’s just the angle that the picture was taken at (for those curious, Luna is referring to a picture I posted on my personal blog of me sitting in front of the computer.) I was leaning forward a little and the Woman was leaning back a little, trying to get both the monitor and me in the frame. Now, I have lost a couple pounds since last year, but that’s due to a change in my diet…which is a good thing since I was over 18 pounds. Now I’m 16ish. Two more pounds this year and everyone will be happy. But thank you for asking. Seriously. It’s nice to know someone notices things like that and cares enough to ask.

Max, ya know how you sometimes get mad because your people won’t let you eat a food because it’ll make flames shoot out your butt? Well, they’re not lying. I ate my dad’s enchilada when his back was turned, and a few hours later–oh yeah, flames out my backside. At least it feels like it. Thought you’d want to know. It really happens!

Good to know, dood.

I still think most of the time my people just don’t want to share, but yeah, that was worth sharing. I don’t think I would mind the actual flames, because hey, I might be able to rocket around the room, but I don’t think I’d enjoy the afterburn.

Thanks for the heads up!

Tags: , ,

Category: 0 - Featured, Ask Max Monday

About the Author ()

Max the Psycho Kitty is 14 pounds of sleek black and white glory. With an attitude ... and opinions ... on everything. He's a put-upon and under-appreciated domestic feline with an addiction to Kitty Crack and an appetite for Stinky Goodness. A pioneer in the Cat Blogosphere, he began his popular blog "The Psychokitty Speaks Out" in October of 2003 Max is the author of three books, "The PsychoKitty Speaks Out: Diary of a Mad Housecat," its sequel "The Psychokitty Speaks Out: Something of Yours Will Meet a Toothy Death," and "The Rules: A Guide For People Owned By Cats."

Comments (6)

Trackback URL | Comments RSS Feed

  1. Rosie Posie says:

    Max, dood, why does meowmy always trys to kis me onna lips? I gotta strait arm her to keeps her lips away. I meen I don kno where her mouf has ben!

    Rosie Posie

  2. Bocce Tabby says:

    Hey Max,
    Will I turn pink if I eat a lot of real live fresh dead shrimps? My hoomin staff lady says that is how flamingos get the pink color. I think I might look good as a pink and black tuxie.
    Yours royally,
    Empress Neki

  3. Dio the Kitty says:

    MAX! Apparently I have something called “cute” all over my body. I don’t know how it got there. Should I be concerned?

  4. Dio the Kitty says:

    Dear Max, you do know that the stabby place isn’t all that bad, don’t you? The dude who runs the stabby place saved my mommy and all my brother’s lives when someone threw us out in the rain in a box. He putted medicines in our eyes so we could get better and find furrever homes. And yeah, he stabbed us a bit too, but that’s better than being a blind alley cat.

  5. TRIPPER says:

    HAY MAX HOW DO I MAKE FLAMES SHOOT OUT MY BUTT? MY LADEY WON’T LET THE TRIPPERDOWN MAN EET MESKIN FOOD.

  6. Penelope says:

    Dear Max, me was recently at a Valentine Ball. Somebody let a whole bunch of squirrels loose and me almost killed one of them… Since me gots back home, me has felt like me is being watched… do yous thinks me is being squirrel stalked?
    Kisses
    Nellie

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox

Join other followers