Ask Max Monday: About Santa’s List…

Ask Max Monday

You are, of course, right about life without cat hair all over being not what it’s cracked up to be.

How many treats are enough? Just one more?

Count out the treats and give them to the kitty one by one.

When he throws up, there’s your answer.

One less than that.

= = =

What are the holiday plans, Max? Anything fun planned?

Eat, sleep, repeat…that’s what I’ve got planned. I WOULD watch the newest Doctor Who, but it won’t be on until freaking New Year. So I’m winding my day around food and sleep, and if I decide I want to be awake for a bit, I’ll talk someone into putting old episode of Who on.

I mean, it’s not Christmas without Doctor Who.

Well, it is, but still.

= = =

Max, dude, I climbed the tree and may or may not have knocked a few ornaments off. Will Santa still visit me? Is there time to get back onto the Good Kitties list???    = Georgie =

Dood, I’m gonna let you in on a secret.

There is no Bad Kitties list.

Cats can’t be good or bad. They just…are. So really, there’s just a list, and you’re on it. And Santa’s not going to pass up a chance to visit you and give you chin and head skritches, even if you’re asleep. So no worries. Besides, your people dragged a tree into the house and loaded it with toys. What did they THINK would happen???

Santa knows, dood. He totally knows.

= = =

Got a question? Drop me a line at or leave it in the comments here.


Category: Ask Max Monday, Featured

About the Author ()

Max the Psycho Kitty is 14 pounds of sleek black and white glory. With an attitude ... and opinions ... on everything. He's a put-upon and under-appreciated domestic feline with an addiction to Kitty Crack and an appetite for Stinky Goodness. A pioneer in the Cat Blogosphere, he began his popular blog "The Psychokitty Speaks Out" in October of 2003. Max is the author of SIX blockbuster hit books, "The Psychokitty Speaks Out: Diary of a Mad Housecat,", its sequel "The Psychokitty Speaks Out: Something of Yours Will Meet a Toothy Death,", "The Rules: A Guide For People Owned By Cats," "Bite Me," "There Once Was a Cat from Nantucket" (a book of poetry), and his new smash hit, "The Emperor of San Francisco [The Wick Chronicles]."

Comments (6)

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  1. KesterGayle says:

    Hey Max! I hope you, Buddah and your peeps all have a wonderful holiday! Maybe the woman will do a Dr Who marathon for you. You deserve it. Don’t eat too much turkey .

  2. Sally Robertson says:

    Hey Dood! I wish you a late happy Yule. Sandy Claws was really nice to me this year …. new boxes to play in, sleep in, tear apart and yummy treats. We don’t have many holiday decorasuns to play with (my hooman is old and lame) but, I had fun anyway and winter means soft blankets to curl up in. Hope you have a happy holiday, too. Love Gracie

  3. messymimi says:

    Merry Christmas, and my cats loved your treat advice and are trying to get me to do it.

    Meanwhile, any New Year’s resolutions?

  4. Yes, Santa knows the way cats operate, and he LURVs all kitties!
    Merry Merry, Happy Happy!

  5. ShawnAileen says:

    Merry Christmas Max, Buddah and peoples! Love your answers Max! Enjoy your day!


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