Ask Max Monday: Conundrum of the Kitties

Ask Max Monday

Hi Max, I think you should be looking to move to the UK. I mean we get Dr Who on the day plus advert free! Gotta be worth a punt at getting the folks ship themselves over here. Now as to questions, do you have a preferred sleeping area for your bed, or do you mix it up with the humans? Also have you a prefered colour and fabric? Being a tux of supreme intelligence and taste, I have to pick everything in this house else Mrs H would have me and the palace in kharki and battleship grey!

Purrs

ERin

If only I could live in the UK without having to leave the house…

I like to mix up my sleeping spots. For a few weeks at a time, I alternate between the tree in the spare room, or this spot on the floor under the rowing machine in the same room (because I can see Buddah coming in from there), the big bed with the Doctor Who comforter, my perch by the narrow window in in the living room, under the bed, or the corner of the big closet.

These days I spent most of my time on the big bed, because it’s comfortable and even if Buddah shows up, there’s enough space that we can pretend the other kitty isn’t there. Also, the people keep the hall light on for me during the day so I can see if Buddah’s approaching, but I can also snuggle up near the pillows where it’s not shining in my eyes.

The main thing these days is being where I can get a sense of where Buddah is. He’s been extra stalkerish, and the only way I can relax is being able to see if he’s near…and without lights on he blends into the background and I don’t see well enough now to figure out which shadow is him. And that bed is super comfy. Definitely my favorite.

Max, whuts yer seekrit for getting the peeps to turn on the danged fireplace? Mine won't do it cuz they say it's a spare the air day. Like the air could get any werse, rite? 

The secret is to have a gas fireplace. Since there’s no wood being burned, it can be used on spare the air days. All I really have to do is stare at it and someone will turn it on. Or shiver. Shivering works wonders.

I wouldn’t score nearly as often if we had a wood burning fireplace. That would need to be cleaned, and my people are notoriously not tidy.

My Mom drew my Paw Print on a card to my dear fellow cat friend! So, should I get some Inks and place my own Paw Print? On the other paw, ink sure would messy my paw! What would you do??

Getting your paw inked is lots of fun! Yes, your paw gets messy, which means you have to clean it off, but there are vegetable-based inks that won’t hurt you. But the best part is that after you get inked and make your paw print, if you wiggle hard enough you can get away and your paw print winds up ALL over the house. The people chase you, and it’s great fun!

If you need to put your paw print on lots of things, I highly recommend getting a stamp made so that you don’t have to endure getting ink on your paw more than once. It’s fun to destroy the house once, but after that it’s just work. A stamp cuts down on the headaches you get after being yelled at.

Hi Max,

Since you are an expert on kitty behavior, please explain to me why three of my kitties get along and treat the fourth kitty like she’s an intruder. I suppose she sort of is an intruder. We adopted 3 litter mates 8 years ago from our local shelter. Two years later someone dumped our fourth kitty in our yard, which in my heart, made her ours! All four are indoor only spayed, neutered kitties and have the run of a three story house. Four litter boxes which they all manage to use and they eat all in the same room but with their own dishes. The three love to chase her around the house and she howls like she howls like her tail is on fire. She then hisses at them. Sometimes they’ll lay on the same bed, but not often. Why do they treat her that way and they’re fairly nice to each other?  After all……….it’s been six years.

Thanks for any insight.

Love, Mom of the Bells……..Sleigh, Tinker, Taco and Deci (she’s the noisy one)

 Well, I’ve lived with Buddah for over 13 years and he still stalks me and attacks for no good reason. You’d think that after all this time he’d just leave me alone, but no.

I think he’s the way he is because he was taken from his mother too early, and no one taught him how to cat. There was no one to pin him down when he got overly rambunctious, no one to swat him when he bit too hard, and no one to make him understand where the line between play and being mean is. I would have taught him all those things if he hadn’t gotten me sick when he came to live with us.

Since the three you had were littermates, and if she was never really taught how to cat, they may have had no incentive to teach her anything. Or they’re so bonded that any other kitty will always be an intruder, and she senses that. If she senses it, she’s not going to relax and engage in what they probably think is just playing. To her, it’s an attack, even if they’re just playing.

I’m not sure what the answer is. We never figured out how to make Buddah be less of a jerk toward me, even though we’re pretty sure why he is the way he is. Some people separate their cats and do a slow re-introduction, but I’m not sure how that would work with four cats.

One thing that helps us a little bit is having Feliway diffusers all over the house. It doesn’t stop Buddah, but it does curb his attacking, enough that the people keep it on subscription order with Amazon.

Deer wise and wonderful Max

iz it too soon to write to Santy Claws and how good do wez have to bee?

Iz letting de meowmie sleep in now and again and having late breakfast gud fur extra credits

Your Canadian Fans 

Oakley and Sugar 

Doods! Now is the perfect time to write Santa! It’s still early in the holiday season and if you drop him a note now, he’ll get it before the crush of mail that’s headed his way in December. It’s not obnoxiously early, and your letter won’t get lost with the masses of other letters he’ll get soon.

Just be polite, ask him how he’s doing, and thank him. He totally won’t mind an early letter.

In fact, I think I might write to him this week, too. I don’t need anything, but he might want a kitty of his own, and Buddah would be happy living amongst all the reindeer.

Got a question for me?
You can leave it in the comments below,
or drop me an email at askmaxmonday@gmail.com.

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About the Author ()

Max the Psycho Kitty is 14 pounds of sleek black and white glory. With an attitude ... and opinions ... on everything. He's a put-upon and under-appreciated domestic feline with an addiction to Kitty Crack and an appetite for Stinky Goodness. A pioneer in the Cat Blogosphere, he began his popular blog "The Psychokitty Speaks Out" in October of 2003. Max is the author of SIX blockbuster hit books, "The Psychokitty Speaks Out: Diary of a Mad Housecat,", its sequel "The Psychokitty Speaks Out: Something of Yours Will Meet a Toothy Death,", "The Rules: A Guide For People Owned By Cats," "Bite Me," "There Once Was a Cat from Nantucket" (a book of poetry), and his new smash hit, "The Emperor of San Francisco [The Wick Chronicles]."

Comments (3)

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  1. Mom Nora says:

    Hey Max, 

    Vicat posted a memory on FB this morning from 5 years ago that said you had some really good words about ferals and the Bridge. So that made me think, when you don’t get any questions sometimes, howzabout pulling out one of those good old columns? Kinda a “Greatest Hits” replay. It’s bound to still be incredibly wise and helpful. 

  2. Max,

    You are wise and wonderful!

    I wish you could have a separate apartment, like we've done for Angel.  She just couldn't live with Da Boyz, and even now…after almost a year…she gets her fur all up when she even hears them downstairs, or if their smell is on my clothes.  Angel was not socialized by the folks whose cat had the litter of kittens that we took Angel and Chuck from, and they didn't play with the kittens AT ALL, knowing they were going to give them away.  Silly people.

  3. HI Max.

    What plans do you have for another book? If you had your own Tv show, besides being about you, what else would you have– cooking, arts and crafts movie reviews? 

    Purrs from across the pond

    ERin

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