Ask Max Monday: I’ll Be There For You, Just Like Friends

Ask Max Monday

Dear Max,
Box day is near and my mom no longer allows me to have any boxes.
I like to sit in them and pee. This makes her go all kinds of crazy.
I never get to have any box fun like the other kitties I read about.
(BACK STORY: I am around 3 years old .. I was adopted about 8 months ago and I have a sister cat who was adopted about 6 months ago. Sister cat chases me around sometimes but I think it’s mostly in fun .. but I’m not sure.) Is there anything I can do or have my mom do that would help me enjoy box day with the rest of my friends?
Sincerely,
Skittles the Cat

Dood, if I knew the answer to that, I would still have boxes around the house. The problem is, I see a box, I want to pee in it, too. I suspect this stems from my innate desire to piss Buddah off to no end because he LOVES boxes, but it means that anytime there’s a perfect box, it winds up outside in the recycling bin.

I miss boxes. But the truth is, I would pee in a good one in a heartbeat if someone left it on the floor, especially if I could get to it before Buddah.

Boxes are one of life’s joys and disappointments, and we’re stuck with the latter part of the equation.

= = =

Dear Max, my sister, Abbi & I just got rescued from the shelter. We dropped into a pretty good scene with food, water, clean litter boxes & all the toys we can explore. And, now we get to look out the window. Bonus! How long will it take for our new digs feel comfortable? The lady seems nice, but we haven’t paid much attention to her yet. How long should we be stand off-ish? Purrs to you, love Beemer

It really depends on how old you are, I think. I got comfortable pretty quick, even though there was a D-O-G to contend with. All I cared about were the window perches and all the food, and the nice, soft, squishy woman who didn’t mind me on her lap. I think an older cat might be a little more skittish, and it can take months to get comfortable.

Take the time you need. Your person understands that you have issues stemming from being a rescue and require time to really feel like you’re at home. Explore, learn the layout and the smells, and when you’re ready—whether it’s a week or a month—you’ll know it. And however long that is, it’s fine. She’s okay with it.

Swearsies.

= = =

Dear Max,

I’ve been reading your stuff for so long that I feel like you’re my big brother. I even remember when you got Buddah and got so sick that you almost died. I never had my own blog, but I loved yours and all the antics that went on in the cat blogosphere, like Skeezix waiting for the bus and all the house trashing parties, and the Catlympics. So you know that means that like you, I’m a pretty old cat.

The Woman in my life has read your No Tears in Heaven post nearly a hundred times and re-read it again when you linked to it this week. Now that I’m old enough that the end could be near or far, who knows, she clings to it.

What I want to know is this. Since there are no Cats Who Came Before Me, and she was my only person, will there by anyone waiting for me at the Bridge? I commented on blogs, but will those kitties know who I am? Will they remember? Maybe through osmosis from their people? She hates the idea that I’d be there alone while I waited for her and I’m not fond of the idea, either. It could be a long time before she’s there.

What happens to the pets who have no one waiting for them?

Will we be okay?

Love,

Me (please don’t print my name)

Dood.

First of all, I remember you from your comments, and if I get there first, I will totally wait for you and greet you with head butts and nose bumps. But if you get there first, don’t worry. All of our blogging buddies who are already there will know who you are, and they’ll be there. I bet Skeezix shows up in his very own little yellow bus, with Jeter and Daisy hanging out the windows, and all the other friends you didn’t know you had.

And if you get there and aren’t sure, just ask for Hank the Dog and Dusty the Cat. Hank was my dog, and Dusty was his cat, and just tell them you know me and need friends, and they’ll keep you company. They’ll show you the ropes.

No one feels lonely at the Bridge. You’ll have lots of friends waiting for you when you get there, even friends you never knew about, and they’ll help you hang out while you wait for your person.

Fair warning about Hank: he’ll sniff your butt so hard you might feel like you’re about to turn inside out, but he means well.

Just know you won’t be alone. I promise.

= = =

Got a question for me?

You can leave it in the comments below,

or drop me an email at askmaxmonday@gmail.com

 

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Category: Ask Max Monday, Featured

About the Author ()

Max the Psycho Kitty is 14 pounds of sleek black and white glory. With an attitude ... and opinions ... on everything. He's a put-upon and under-appreciated domestic feline with an addiction to Kitty Crack and an appetite for Stinky Goodness. A pioneer in the Cat Blogosphere, he began his popular blog "The Psychokitty Speaks Out" in October of 2003. Max is the author of SIX blockbuster hit books, "The Psychokitty Speaks Out: Diary of a Mad Housecat,", its sequel "The Psychokitty Speaks Out: Something of Yours Will Meet a Toothy Death,", "The Rules: A Guide For People Owned By Cats," "Bite Me," "There Once Was a Cat from Nantucket" (a book of poetry), and his new smash hit, "The Emperor of San Francisco [The Wick Chronicles]."

Comments (6)

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  1. No one feels lonely at The Rainbow Bridge. This line has me all leaky eyed and a big lump in my throat, Max.

  2. Thanks Max. But mom had to go get a tissue

  3. We think we will all know each other at the bridge.

    The Florida Furkids

  4. Turtle Lover says:

    Dear Max,
    Thank you for your input. I think we should start a
    “pee in the box” day!!
    Sincerely,
    Skittles the Cat

  5. purrmonster says:

    Awww, my inferior cheap computer screen is going all blurry.

  6. Erin the Cat says:

    Max, what would you do if you didn’t have a blog, or if you were, heaven forbid, a human? OK so maybe being a human isn’t so bad, but they do have a lot of issues and hang ups and not just in the closet department.
    Lots of purrs
    ERin

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