Ask Max Monday: One Day At a Time…

Ask Max Monday

Hello! It is Cat Scouts Mango and Willow… as I, Mango explained in an earlier email, we lost our beloved Sisfurr Aspen recently at age 15. She stopped eating. And she rarely went to our Mom to Meow and say that she was very  sick and to tell Mom she had stopped eating and drinking.

 When Mom found Aspen as badly Sick, she did rally and took Aspen to our Veterinarian! Mom did her very best to force feed Aspen. But Aspen was very very weak and she ran off to the Rainbow Bridge!

Mine and Willow joint questions are, how long will it take for new Cat Jordan River to stop smelling that strange “different, new cat smell?”

And, how long can we get away with failing to accept Jordan? Truthfully, at times, each of us has been near to Jordan and we each forgot to HISS!

 We say Jordan should at least have sent us a card to make usses aware that she was moving in!

Actually, its Mom,  her fault!  She didnt tell us! Well maybe Mom did say she met a cat needing a home! She just showed up with new. Cat, Jordan River!

So Max, usses Cats we have our Cat DIGNITY and PRIDE! 

Should we just accept Jordan and be done with our Hissy Fitting? 

And, we still really miss our sweet Aspen, and Mom misses Aspen too!

Mom insists Jordan really needed a home! And if she did need a HOME, when I, Mango,  needed a home bad, Mom took me in right away!!

So we two being Cat Scouts, also should accept Jordan River! 

Max, should we insist on still having Lots of Wet Food??

We are finally thinking we are not acting as friendly Cat Scouts should! 

We did accept BellaJo!

And, even getting to know BellaJo, that took awhile! Plus we really knew BellaJo needed a great home with Mom! Her previous home didnt feed her well!

Plus Our Tigger got bad sick with PeeMonia!  Umm, oopsy, no that isnt what Tigger had! No, Tigger had Pneumonia, that is it! 

Mom really helped our sissfur Tigger to get better!  Mom took Tigger to the Veterinarian!  So, Mom was giving our Tigger special Tablets 3 times a day and force feeding Our Tigger with Veterinarian wet food too!   Plus, Mom, she also had to force give  Tigger Drinking Water too!

So we both know our Mom is a very good Mom! And if Willow keeps a sneezing! She will go to our Veterinarian and get poked and prodded and Willow will get stabhed 4 or 5 times too!

So, how do we accept Jordan, and still maintain our cat Dignity??

Thanks Max!

Scout Mango

Scout Willow

Doods…just make your lives easier and accept Jordan. The real dignity lies in kindness and comfort, and not accepting her makes her feel bad. Now, that doesn’t mean she’s going to accept YOU for a while, but that’s all right. You’ll know you’re doing the right thing.

Buddah and I never learned to get along, and that’s one of my (and the Woman’s) regrets. If I hadn’t gotten so sick after he got here we might have become great friends, but now we just tolerate each other.

The older I get, the more I think that all the hissing and growling was just never worth it. It took energy better spent on naps and things, and just created stress. If you accept her now rather than later, you might make a really good friend who will become a really terrific sister, and you can nap together in a giant furry pile of wonderful.

You have an awesome opportunity here. I hope you take it.

= = =

Dear Max, happy birthday month. Speaking of age, did you know there have been cats that have lived into their 30′? Do you ever think about how long you will live? Would you still do your column? Would Budda take over? Some people think about these things when their birthday comes along.

I’ve been thinking about how long I would live since I was 3 years old and got so sick that the people thought I was going to die then. No one ever thought I would make it to 19—heck, when I was 15 the Woman tried to prepare people for the inevitability, because I was kinda punkish and she wasn’t sure what I had left.

Now, though, I take it one day at a time and understand that I’ve had more years than most kitties, and that every day I get is gravy. I’m not sure how much longer I want to live; I’m kinda raggedy now, and quite frail, with a super weak back end that makes me stumble every now and then. Living to 30 seems like punishment. But I still love food most days and annoying the Woman, so as long as those things make me happy, I’m content, and I’ll keep going.

But y’all need to be prepared…while the Woman says she won’t be surprised if I see 20, she also won’t be surprised if I don’t. And that’s okay. My life has been fantastic and I’ve been graced with the opportunity to share my good fortune when and where I can, so if there aren’t many days left…just know, I’m thrilled with the time I had, and I’m looking forward to seeing Hank the Dog and Dusty, the Cat Who Came Before Me, at the Bridge along with all my friends. We’re gonna party, and it will be glorious.

What happens to this column isn’t really up to me; it’s up to Mousebreath. Buddah’s not young anymore, either, so I don’t know if he would want to take up the work or not. But the Woman will probably keep my Wick books alive, because that’s kind of a way to keep me with her.

Maybe there’s a snarky young cat out there ready to step into my massive paw prints. Or maybe—I don’t know—Ask Max Monday will end with me. I’ve asked the Woman about a “Best Of” book and she might do that, but again…we don’t know.

I have to admit, this column has been a highlight for me. I’ve laughed a lot, and I’ve cried. Whatever happens to it, the time I had caring for it was totally worth it.

= = =

MAX WHATJA DO ON YOUR BIRTHDAY???

Slept in the closet. Then slept in my room (I have my own bedroom!) on the sofa (which is like a bed for me.) Then I slept on the big bed. When I’d napped enough, there was real live fresh dead steak, then I spent some time on the Woman’s lap. After that…back to the closet I went.

It was AWESOME.

Well, it was awesome right up to the point where I was getting a drink from my fountain and Buddah jammed his cold, wet nose up my asterisk. That was rude.

= = =

Oh my Bast, Max, the sticky people are STILL home all the time! Are they ever going back to school???

Nope.

This is your life now.

Enjoy.

= = =

Got a question for me? You can leave it in the comments or email me at askmaxmonday -at- gmail dot com.

Category: Ask Max Monday, Featured

About the Author ()

Max the Psycho Kitty is 14 pounds of sleek black and white glory. With an attitude ... and opinions ... on everything. He's a put-upon and under-appreciated domestic feline with an addiction to Kitty Crack and an appetite for Stinky Goodness. A pioneer in the Cat Blogosphere, he began his popular blog "The Psychokitty Speaks Out" in October of 2003. Max is the author of SIX blockbuster hit books, "The Psychokitty Speaks Out: Diary of a Mad Housecat,", its sequel "The Psychokitty Speaks Out: Something of Yours Will Meet a Toothy Death,", "The Rules: A Guide For People Owned By Cats," "Bite Me," "There Once Was a Cat from Nantucket" (a book of poetry), and his new smash hit, "The Emperor of San Francisco [The Wick Chronicles]."

Comments (3)

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  1. Max, we so think that celebrating for a whole month is the way to go!
    We are hoping that Sweetie will get along with Da Boyz; we are very slowly introducing them…like, at glacial speed. You see, I’m taking advantage of my working-from-home time.

  2. Angel and Gandalf says:

    Max, you’re right that Mango and Willow should just accept Jordan.

    But seriously, they should also insist on gushy food as a reward for their big-heartedness!

  3. messymimi says:

    Oh, my, that line about Buddha and his cold, wet nose — well, i laughed so hard my Sweetie thought something had to be wrong, i couldn’t catch my breath.

    Hope you are having a fabulous birthday month!

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