Ask Max Monday: Shiver Yer Timbers…It’s Nice Here!

Ask Max Monday

Max – we got these new floors at our house. They are NOT carpet and we slide all over the place chasing toys. The mom thinks it is funny. Is it really ok for her to laugh that hard when we can’t apply the brakes on the new floor?

It might not be okay, but dood…I would be laughing at you, too. Come on, it’s just funny. It’s what You Tube gold is made from.

Heck, if I was young enough to run that hard, I’d be doing it on purpose. Sliding sounds like fun!

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Do you know that your snark, common sense and all around marvelousness is such that you can bring an old lady smiles, joy, outright belly laughs as well as tears, both happy and sad.  You and your family bring joy to us cat servants, and I just wanted to thank you.  Much love, purrs and head bonks, Linda

Way to state the obvious, Linda.

LOL no…for realz, thank you. It makes my black heart all warm and fuzzy to know I’m making you smile.

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Dear Max, thank you for answering my questions about Frank. I have another one but I must tell you it is of a senative nature.  As you know Frank is now 19 and has thyroid problems. He has for a while been doing his business all over the floor. He is hardly , if at all, using his litter box. We know why he is doing this, because of his condition, and we are not mad at him because it is not his fault. But my mother is getting tired of cleaning up after him. We are in a quandary. We understand the problem, he cannot control it and we do not want to scold him. What can we do? We really love Frank. We have had him practically his whole life.  Steve L.

This really does call for a trip to the stabby place. There may be something more going on than thyroid issues, or it might indicate that it’s time to adjust his medications. If he needs a higher dose now, he may be eliminating away from the litter box because he just can’t get to it in time. At 19 he might not recognize that his bladder is filling until it’s already full, and by then it’s too late.

But there could be other things, too, and they need to be addressed. It’s not likely that he’s avoiding the box just because he has thyroid issues; everything I’ve been reading this evening suggests there’s always something else. He might have pain when he voids, indicating a urinary tract issue. He might be creeping up on diabetes. Or it might be dementia—he may forget where or what the box is.

The place to start is with the vet. Make sure there’s nothing else going on with him. And if there’s nothing, he’s otherwise healthy, try getting a brand new box (we get a new one every six months. And this week is New Box Week! I’m so excited); maybe the current box smells wrong. Change litters—he might not want to put his feet in whatever you’re using now. Try to figure out if the placement of the box is inconvenient to him, or if the sides are difficult for him to step over.

Hopefully, it’s just him getting old and not caring where he goes; if that’s the case, you may just have to put up with it. And thank you for not scolding him. I’ve gone outside the box a few times in the last month (Buddah issues) and I’ve really appreciated that the Woman just shrugs it off and cleans it up. I know Frank appreciates it, too.

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Cold? What’s that? I looked outside today and it was bright and sunny, and the Woman said it was really nice out. She even smelled like sun shine! Maybe you need to see the stabby guy…there are medications for being too cold.


Move to Catifornia, dood! We’re nice and warm here!


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Category: Ask Max Monday, Featured

About the Author ()

Max the Psycho Kitty is 14 pounds of sleek black and white glory. With an attitude ... and opinions ... on everything. He's a put-upon and under-appreciated domestic feline with an addiction to Kitty Crack and an appetite for Stinky Goodness. A pioneer in the Cat Blogosphere, he began his popular blog "The Psychokitty Speaks Out" in October of 2003. Max is the author of SIX blockbuster hit books, "The Psychokitty Speaks Out: Diary of a Mad Housecat,", its sequel "The Psychokitty Speaks Out: Something of Yours Will Meet a Toothy Death,", "The Rules: A Guide For People Owned By Cats," "Bite Me," "There Once Was a Cat from Nantucket" (a book of poetry), and his new smash hit, "The Emperor of San Francisco [The Wick Chronicles]."

Comments (4)

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  1. Mousebreath Magazine says:

    Let me butt in for just a sec re Frank’s pee problems. Is he going both nbr 1 and nbr 2 outside the box, or just Number 1? If it’s only Number 1 he’s having a problem with, it’s more likely a UTI problem. If he’s not using the box ever for either one, it is most likely related to arthritis — it’s too hard for him to enter the box. If it’s dementia, there’s not much you can do, unless you think adding more boxes around the house will help. (There is a kitty version of depends, but if he’s gone commando all his life, he might not take to wearing panties–all the same, it could be worth a try.)

    But back to the arthritis possibility — If you go to Home Depot, you can find somewhere some large plastic pans with very short lips that would provide easy ingress as a modified litter pan. We got one years ago when Mao’s arthritis got so bad and it worked out really well. I can’t remember exactly what they were — maybe for mixing up paint or mortar or something. (Warning: if your other cats use it, they might fling litter all over the place; we placed Mao’s in an area where only he had access. )

    Also, I cannot more highly recommend Dr Elsey’s Cat Attract. Sprinkle a little on the litter and it sends out “STOP WHAT YER DOIN’ AND COME PEE ON ME!” signals to the cat. It’s magical.

  2. messymimi says:

    About slidey floors — one lady who adopted one of our bottle-raised kittens had a dachshund, and the dog and cat used the floors to play. The dog would chase the cat through the house, then they would both slide on the floor and bump into the wall, pick themselves up and the cat would chase the dog back to the other end of the house, slide, bump bump, reverse the chase. The floor itself was their favorite toy besides each other.

    As for California, i’ll give you that the weather can be great, but if you move there you have to live with everything about California, not just the weather. Depending on your politics or other circumstances, that might be great or it might not be worth it.

    • Lee Bordenet says:

      Thanks for stating the fact about California. I love warm weather and the ocean, but could not stand the politics there. So we ended up in Phoenix. Lots of warm weather, but no ocean. You can’t always get everything you want.

  3. Puppy pee pads really helped us, when Chucky was having litter box problems. We did all kinds of things to help his constipation, and it got better but he still prefered to stand up while urinating, which meant the walls got hosed! I used painter’s tape to put the pee pads up high, et voila!


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