Ask Max Monday: WINTER IS COMING…to an end

Ask Max Monday

Max, what are your thoughts about Sherlock Holmes? AC Doyle wrote his stories a long time ago, but since then, lots of writers continue to write about Holmes’s unique abilities to help solve crime (if the coppers will let him!) I wonder how many people believe he was a real, live human?

Well, honestly, the most exposure I’ve had to Sherlock Holmes is from the TV show “Elementary” and I’m pretty sure that deviated from the books a whole bunch. But I really liked it, even though I missed the last season. Hm. I need to get the Woman on that. I bet we can stream it somewhere. Or it’s still on the DVR. I gotta see it.

If you start to Google about him, the farthest you get is “Was Sherlock” and it autofill with “a real person” so I’m guessing a lot of people either think he was or they aren’t sure. But he was modeled after a real person, so I suppose he kind of was.

Joseph Bell, to save y’all some Googling. He was one of Doyle’s medical professors.

And yes, I looked it up. Because I totally wasn’t sure.

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Hi hi Max

Itz Oakley and Sugar from Canada…

Wez wants to know iffin wez sud buy de meowmie a kard and gift fur Valentine’s day. 

Sud wez try to find her a nice fresh mouse or a nice crunchy bug? Which do youse think she’d like bestest?

Wez lovz her lotz bekause she buys our numz and toys. 

P.s. howz do wez gets a kool mancatcave..dat rocks. 

Your Canuck fans 

Oakley and Sugar 

Doods, you should totally get her a card and gift. Now, I’m pretty sure people don’t like mice since they’re always trying to trap and get rid of them, so I would lean towards a creepy crawly kind of thing.

For years, there was a spider in our bathroom, the kind with super skinny long legs, and the Woman never tried to get rid of him. In fact, she named him Leonardo and got all weepy when she accidentally sent him sailing down the bathtub drain (she wasn’t wearing her glasses and didn’t realize he was that close until it was too late.) I think that would be a fine gift, a long-legged spider who can live in your bathroom.

They’re terrific, because they keep the lesser wanted bugs at bay, which mean you never have to feed them. And they don’t bite, so they’re never really a nuisance.

In fact, I think I’ll look around the house and see if I can find another one and convince him to move into the bathroom. We can name him Donatello or Michaelangelo!

She’s gonna be SO happy.

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Dude, when will winter be over? I miss having the windows open for sniffing fresh air and yelling at birds and dogs and the mailman.

We won’t know for sure until next Sunday. That’s when the groundhog in PA pops his head up and either shrugs and comes out for snack treats, or he screams because there are 1,831 people standing around his hole in the ground and retreats. If he shrugs, winter is over. If he screams, it’ll be six more weeks.

Don’t ask me what happens if he screams first and then shrugs. But he better get his snack, because the intrusion is just rude.

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Go Niners, Max? GO NINERS!

Oh yeah. There’s a sports ball thingy next weekend, isn’t there. I’m not personally invested in the outcome because apparently cats can’t bet on things, which is total speciism, so I gave up on watching the TV for touchbacks and home dunks. But the Man is excited, so for his sake GO 49ers!

Got a question? Drop me a line at askmaxmonday@gmail.com or leave it in the comments here.

 

Category: Featured

About the Author ()

Max the Psycho Kitty is 14 pounds of sleek black and white glory. With an attitude ... and opinions ... on everything. He's a put-upon and under-appreciated domestic feline with an addiction to Kitty Crack and an appetite for Stinky Goodness. A pioneer in the Cat Blogosphere, he began his popular blog "The Psychokitty Speaks Out" in October of 2003. Max is the author of SIX blockbuster hit books, "The Psychokitty Speaks Out: Diary of a Mad Housecat,", its sequel "The Psychokitty Speaks Out: Something of Yours Will Meet a Toothy Death,", "The Rules: A Guide For People Owned By Cats," "Bite Me," "There Once Was a Cat from Nantucket" (a book of poetry), and his new smash hit, "The Emperor of San Francisco [The Wick Chronicles]."

Comments (3)

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  1. No spiders or creepy crawly things live long in our place, Max! Da Boyz either eat them, or play with them until they are long gone.

  2. Erin the Cat says:

    Max, how will you be preparing for Valentines Day? If not you, will the staff be setting out their stall for each other or do they just, like, ignore and carry on regardless? What would your tips be for the best gifts a Cool Cat like yourself could get or give on this strange day….. and given the opportunity what would you give to The Dr?
    Purrs
    ERin

  3. messymimi says:

    The fact is, so many people think Sherlock is a real person that someone was hired years ago to answer letters written to him, while the grave of his creator was very neglected. Fame is a funny thing.

    The Daddy-Long-Legs is just as you say, harmless except to the bugs we don’t want in our homes.

    The groundhog legend is built around the weather prognostication ideas people have had for a long time. Many noticed years ago that if winter is very mild in early February, it will roar back and last a while longer, while if the weather is downright awful at that time, winter is “spending itself out” right then and spring will come sooner. It used to work, but with climates changing, i am not sure how accurate it is nowl

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