Mao is a cranky 16-year-old Siamese who enjoys braying like a donkey, shaking for treats and peeing on stuff -- not necessarily in that order.
My Food Lady came bak frum Florida this week loded with cat treets, and I have tride evry singul one. If yer reely into pork, I have good nooz for you. Friskies Party Mix has just rolled out two new flavors: Maui Luau and Morning Munch Crunch, and they’re flavored with PORK. Yes, [...]
Hello, my frends. I made the video above as a public service messidge for cats arownd the werld — it’s espeshully relevunt during the holiday seezin. Pleeze take it to hart and way in with yer thots on the matter. (Pleeze do not let yer peeple know whut I’m saying in this importunt messidge.) Thank [...]
Hello, my frends. I am heer today to make a holiday gift rekumendation to you — or just a good book to reed on yer own and git sum good ideas. It’s called I Could Pee on This: And Other Poems by Cats and boy, is it ever good. As you may or mayn’t know, [...]
Thare’s a reezin that cats have NO competishun frum dogs when it comes to the qwest for werld dominayshun, and that reezin is DOGS R STOOPID as evidensed by the foto above. Cats rule, dogs drool. THE END.
“You can’t always get what you want. But if you try sometimes you just might find you get what you need.” — Mick Jagger & Keith Richards Skeezix: Why are we doing meditations this week insted of Chey and Ichi? Mao: I think Chey is away gitting Liposukshun on her big booty. Skeezix: So what [...]
Dood, ware’s Max?Max is at home wating for his woman to git her bupkiss in geer and help him tipe. She was wisked off by a pink Tardis this weekend whilst waring a lowd pare of pink patternd tites and big fake boobs. We assoom she has bin committed to the funny farm. Max [...]
All the snark, just not as funny. Life Coach Max Thompson’s column will not appear this week. His typist had the bad manners to bail on him due to illness and he was not able to grow opposable thumbs in time to get the column out. In the meantime, please send the typist your regards [...]
Hay everycat this is Mao with this week’s moovey rekumendation. It’s hard to peel me away frum Sqwerls and Birds, my all-time favorite moovey, but this one comes close and yer peeple will like it too I garuntee it. It is all about a bunny named Figaro herding sheeps! It is vary funny, thare’s lots [...]
Let’s face it. Most of you kittehs only reed Mousebreath cuz yer bord and thare’s only so much nappin’ you can do during the day. If you think yer afflikted with CB (Cat Boredom), help is on the way… of korse, YOO have to take that ferst step. In this PSA, lern the simtums of [...]
I didn’t think I would like this movie cuz it has two of my unfavoritest things in the werld in it: dogs and babies. Yuck. But boy, is it ever a grate movie! There’s lots of akshun. The stoopid dog runs and runs and runs and runs in sercles playing with that little blerpy thing. [...]
Hi everycat. Today I’m going to review a movie that I’ve watched abowt a squillion times this week. All my life I’ve bin begging my lady to git me a fish tank. It wood solve a lot of problims. Like she woodn’t have to open cans of stinky goodness so offin and I woodn’t be [...]
Skeezix wuz in New York so this week I’m reviewing a Meowvelous Movie without him butting his hed in. You know how much I luv berds and sqwerls. This week I have an entire 10-part seereez of bird and sqwerl mooveez that will nok yer pants off. It’s called Birds/Squirrels on a Stone Wall. Now [...]
MAO: Kittehs, if yer looking for a way to have fun this weekend, check out the new iPad game by Friskies, You vs. Cat. SKEEZIX: Mao, you hogged the hole game. I could hardly git a paw in. MAO: Yer lame. Time to man up. This is a game that yoo can play with yer [...]
Welcome to this week’s edishun of Meowvelous Movies, the movie review for cats. This week, we’re reviewing Penguin Cam, a streaming feed of hot — I mean, cold — penguin action. SKEEZIX: Are pengwinz fish or berds? MAO: That’s a good qweschun. I’d have to smell one to be shur. They walk on the grownd. [...]
I watch this moovie evry singul day. The man (hoo makes the pikchers start on the skreen) sez it’s my warm-up movie. It is called “Game for Cats” and it’s made by Hiccup and it is GRATE! You can git it for the iPad on iToonz. It has BOTH the red dot game and a [...]
This is a cawtionary tale for all you poor cats out thare (like me) hooz stoopid peeple think it’s funny to dress you up for holidays like Thanksgiving. If yer peeple are REELY stoopid, they mite try to dress you up like a Thanksgiving Turkey in a CHIKKIN costume!!!! Now this is rong on so [...]
Mousebreath Scores Pair of BlogPaws Awards
The highlight of the BlogPaws Pet Blogging and Social Media conference each year is the awards ceremony on Saturday night which celebrates accomplishments in pet blogging. This year, Mousebreath won two of the awards. One, for Best Video, and the second for Best Cat Blog. Mousebreath would not exist but for the contributions of Max [...]
Obituary: Gracey the Tiniest Tiger
BlogPaws was bittersweet this year. My dear friend, Joanne McGonagle, could not attend because her boss and muse, Gracey the Tiniest Tiger, had a health crisis which ended in her journey to The Bridge. Gracey gained national attention when she won Bissell’s MVP Contest in 2010 and donated $10,000 to PurrEver Ranch Sanctuary — a [...]
Meditations with Meezers: Island of Good Will
How I wish that somewhere there existed an island for those who are wise of good will. -Albert Einstein Chey says: I believe this island is populated only by cats. Ichiro: But then who feeds them stinky goodness?
Ask Max Monday: Good Thinks + Big Brain = Me. Right?
Dear Max, My mommy and daddy went out and came back with necklaces for me and my brother just like the big kitties wear! Only mine kept getting stuck in my mouth so they took it off and said I was still too little to wear a necklace. Now my brother makes fun of me [...]
Purrime Ministerettes Shiva and Jaya
Today we want to introduce the Purrime Ministerettes of Planet Purrth, Shiva and Jaya. They stand at the service of all anipals except snakies. (They do, however, serve allicattors and crocs and caidudes!) They absolutely love spiders and would have them for dinner, but their mom says no. We wonder why. Who would not [...]
Giveaway: SHEBA Gourmet Cat Food Gift Basket
Did somebody say NOMS? Ha! I knew I could get your attention! Whether you’re a kitteh or kitteh lover, Mousebreath and SHEBA have something for you! Mousebreath has partnered with SHEBA® Entrees for the launch of their “SHEBA. Feed Your Passion™” Contest, featuring cat lover Eva Longoria. The SHEBA® brand celebrates the many [...]
Top Tips for Traveling with Your Cat (INFOGRAPHIC)
As I’m traveling this week across the country to BlogPaws, I wonder what it would be like to travel with Skeezix or Tripper (Mao is out of the question since he’d bray at the top of his lungs for the entire duration of the flight.) Since Tripper’s size exceeds airline regulations for under-seat travel, that [...]
These dressy vintage cat flats feature three smiling cat faces on each shoe. They’re gilded in silver and gold tones, and available in a size 6. If you have teeny feet, you can score these for the low low price of $20!
This mancat mancave is a nice refyoodge win yer trying to git away frum yer pesky sister. It purrvides a kozy hidey hole with slits ware you can still see evrything that’s going on. And thare’s a washable cushun on top in case you want a better view. It’s a stylish deezine, not that I [...]
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