Max the Psycho Kitty is 14 pounds of sleek black and white glory. With an attitude ... and opinions ... on everything.
He's a put-upon and under-appreciated domestic feline with an addiction to Kitty Crack and an appetite for Stinky Goodness. A pioneer in the Cat Blogosphere, he began his popular blog "The Psychokitty Speaks Out" in October of 2003.
Max is the author of SIX blockbuster hit books, "The Psychokitty Speaks Out: Diary of a Mad Housecat,", its sequel "The Psychokitty Speaks Out: Something of Yours Will Meet a Toothy Death,",
"The Rules: A Guide For People Owned By Cats," "Bite Me," "There Once Was a Cat from Nantucket" (a book of poetry), and his new smash hit, "The Emperor of San Francisco [The Wick Chronicles]."
What kind of charity needs her to wear those pants, or do i want to know? Max, what is your very favorite toy of all time ? She doesn’t HAVE to wear them and I think the charity would prefer she didn’t. SHE LIKES THEM. I KNOW! I don’t really have a favorite toy since […]
Those pants should be illegal, Max! Here’s my question: Why can’t you talk Buddah into barfing on those pants, so they are ruined and must me dispatched to the Great Pants God in the sky? That will teach her…*evil grin* It wouldn’t do any good to have him hork on them. Aside from having a […]
Max, why did it go all black this week? It was pretty cool. The humans couldn’t see and it wuz funny cuz we could see just fine. I can’t wait for it to go all black again. The Northern California power outage is a complicated topic, but I’ll say this much: everything went black because […]
Hey Max, So the mom set up a room for the foster kittens and it is great cause they have their own space (OK – except Daiquiri isn’t happy cause it is harder for her to get to the kitten food, but whatever). Then the other night mom comes home and brings BACK a foster […]
hay max! What are yoo dressin up as fer halloween this yeer? How bout Buddah? And how many sleeps till krissmiss? How much longer do I hafta be good for Santa to bring me stuff? This year I’m gonna be a world-renowned author for Halloween. And like a lot of writers, I’ll be hiding in […]
Dear Max. Thanks for the Costco tip. Now as we liked your Christmas decoration post last week, we got to wondering what we would celebrate if, heaven forbid, Christmas didn’t exist. Also how we would celebrate the alternative. What would be your idea of a celebration and how would you celebrate it? Purrs Erin Paws […]
Hi Max, Mahm sez I make a better door than a windo. Wut duz dat mean?! (Dis jennerly happen in bed rite befor she deeside I dont get to sit on her buhk or nekk or teevee stan no more.) Fanks, Gracie It means you’re fat, dood. Large and in charge. A Chonky Kitty. Don’t […]
Max, how sweet that you bought a bicycle for your meowmy! I like that she celebrates her birthday for a whole month; I try to do the same! My birthday, however, is in a cold month, so I always have changeable weather. My next birthday is a BIG ONE, so what do you suggest that […]
Hi Guys! Did you get the woman a present? We never get our humans a present. We are all the gifts they need! Paxx & Rosie I got her a new bicycle. She thinks she bought it for herself, but we all know the truth. It was me. All me. I let her pick out […]
This weekend the Woman has been off doing things other than paying attention to me and catering to my whims. Worse, the Man is complicit in her inattention by going off and doing things with her. We’ve gotten NO work done, and because of that, no Ask Max Monday this week. Today, though, it’s her […]
I sent you a letter about 2 weeks ago. It could be that I did not send it. It could be that while you were on vacation you missed it. I wrote a very heartfelt letter and I cannot duplicate it here. I will try to give you the jist of the letter. Our cat, […]
Max, I don’t know if you publish ressipeez, but I haff one for kittehs dat liff in hotter plases: Speshill Wotter. It is EZ to make if you can find a hooman wiff fumbs to open da freezer and get da cold crunchie wotter yoonits owt. Poot da cold crunchie wotter yoonits in da wotter […]
Buddah good to see you AND your dignity. My question is why is it as soon as the credit card is paid off a cat has to get sick and cost lots of money at the V-E-T ?! I asked Buddah his opinion on this, but it’s been an hour and he’s still talking, and […]
Hi. Buddah here. Max didn’t get any questions for this week and he’s sulking in the other room, or maybe he’s working, I’m not really sure since it looks the same no matter what he’s doing, and he might be working because the Mom is taking notes and she usually does that when they work, […]
Hey Max, my life is ruined. They added a kitten to the household and it’s really ticked me off. He’s always in my grill. The peeple took him to the stabby place to get fixed, but when he got home he was the same old irritating kitten–his irritatingness had obviously not been fixed. Can I […]
I know, I know, there was no Ask Max Monday last Monday, but I have a pretty good reason and it involves nausea and not wanting to eat and an ouchy case of the Hershey Squirts…which I caught from BUDDAH. He got over it in a couple days. Me, not so much. There was a […]
Dear Max, Box day is near and my mom no longer allows me to have any boxes. I like to sit in them and pee. This makes her go all kinds of crazy. I never get to have any box fun like the other kitties I read about. (BACK STORY: I am around 3 years […]
Hello, Max, this is Horizon, and you always have such great answers that I thought I would talk things over with you. My Dad is the only person on earth I trust, ‘cause that lady he keeps around is the one who gives me medicine and takes me to the V-E-T. Anyway, they are planning […]
Max, that is so cool that younow all this stuff. Where do you get it all from—reading, or do you have a hot line to that Julien guy and his encyclingpedia book? I’m clearly mixing with the wrong sort of mice as I’ve never met ones with gloves. Where isit this Mickey lives, as I’d […]
Hey Max, I’ve caught more than a cupple of mice in my time, and not a single one has worn gloves. So please tell me: why does Mickey Mouse wear gloves? Two words: STICKY PEOPLE. Poor Mickey lives AND works in a place that’s always overrun by thousands and thousand of sticky people, and those […]
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