Category: Ask Max Monday

Ask Max Monday: I Yelled At Mr. Boo

Ask Max Monday: I Yelled At Mr. Boo

There were no questions for this week, which is okay because I had a totally traumatic experience and am still recovering from it. I mean, there I was, having a nice quiet life, minding my own business, taking a nap on the big bed, when the Woman came in and woke me up and then […]

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Ask Max Monday: We Be Stylin’…

Ask Max Monday: We Be Stylin’…

Here’s a question for you: How can I tell Manny and Chili Bruce apart, now that CB lost his one white whisker. They are both black cats! Sure, CB’s tailio is a bit poofier, and Manny’s tummy white spot is bigger, but these things are not easily apparent. We could put collars on them, and […]

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Ask Max Monday: Yer A Kitty Clock, Lily…

Ask Max Monday: Yer A Kitty Clock, Lily…

Hey Max, After mama read the mice flavored cat food it got me thinking. A lot of out door cats eat birdies. How come there’s not more cat food that’s birdie flavored? I’m not talking chickens, turkeys or ducks. I’m talking pigeon, finches, sparrows, robins, etc? My stalker Peeping Tom that’s his main diet and […]

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Ask Max Monday: Mice-A-Roni Is Not a Thing…

Ask Max Monday: Mice-A-Roni Is Not a Thing…

Max…how do we explain to the foster momma cat that all her yelling about “I need a boyfriend” isn’t going to accomplish anything here. Of course, there’s Junior, but he is nootered so that doesn’t count. Plus he is probably afraid of her. Can we leave her a sign on her door or something? Cause […]

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Ask Max Monday: I Do What I Want. Srsly.

Ask Max Monday: I Do What I Want. Srsly.

Dear Max. I love all those cat images that you collected. Do you think I should start collecting cats too? I mean I do the usual collections, Mice, Stamps (on spiders and bugs) and Antique cow creamers, but think maybe I should be branching out… but not squirrels. I did try collecting sparrows once, but […]

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Ask Max Monday: Interviewish

Ask Max Monday: Interviewish

Max: how can you tell if something is mentally wrong with one of your sisfurs? She likes to go outside with the mom, she doesn’t like catnip or whipped cream, and she sleeps in the cat carrier. What gives?? There’s nothing wrong with her, she’s just different, and that’s kinda cool. It takes guts to […]

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Ask Max Monday: Thank You, And Yes, I Am…

Ask Max Monday: Thank You, And Yes, I Am…

If the mom has oxtail soup then I should get some too right? Because she is a food hoarder and not good at sharing anything. Also, since I have been sick and having radiation and stuff, I have asked the mom to get off her fat butt and hello me write a book. She has […]

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Ask Max Monday: The Photoshoot Edition

Ask Max Monday: The Photoshoot Edition

The Man took this week off from passing gas, and he’s still off and the People are just kinda goofing off and not being very helpful, so it was a good week to not get any questions. While they’ve been going out an about, I’ve been napping and plotting (book stuff, not, like overthrow the […]

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Ask Max Monday: Let’s ALL go Sledding!

Ask Max Monday: Let’s ALL go Sledding!

Deer Max really what is wrong with smacking mine brofur down the stairs? The Mom really hollered at me for that. I say he just tripped over mine paw. She wasn’t there. She just saw him plopping down the last couple of steps. Would it have been really bad if I actually DID smack and […]

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Ask Max Monday: It Never Snows In Catifornia…

Ask Max Monday: It Never Snows In Catifornia…

Max! For the last 15 years my Humom has been stealing my poop every single day but today I noticed an email confirming her membership in something called the Kitty Poop Club. Does this mean that it’s not just her but an entire club harvesting kitty poop? I’m stunned to learn that for so many […]

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Ask Max Monday: Salute Your (Rainbow) Shorts

Ask Max Monday: Salute Your (Rainbow) Shorts

Dood – how come my mom is stoopid? I mean, she can’t see me when I’m right in front of her and she calls and calls and calls mine name and then freaks out when I don’t show up. Because I can see her. Why can’t she see me? I mean, I am right in […]

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Ask Max Monday: Zzzzz

Ask Max Monday: Zzzzz

Please settle an argument for me: I say that pooping in the mom’s slippers took a lot of skill. She says it’s just gross. Who is right? Well, really, you both are. I mean, getting your asterisk over the opening in the slippers takes some wicked math skills, calculating trajectory and all, and success is […]

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Ask Max Monday: Mocking’s Not Just For Birds…

Ask Max Monday: Mocking’s Not Just For Birds…

Dear Max, Due to a mouse shortage in these here parts, of the live but soon to be beaded kind, what can I use to keep my hunting skils high and still get the fun of the chase ? Toodle pips and purrs Erin There are always things in a house that can be hunted. […]

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Ask Max Monday: You’ve Got To Be Kitten Me…

Ask Max Monday: You’ve Got To Be Kitten Me…

Max, you have such a catspractical solution to these daily human kitten issues. I really liked the one about kitten sitting, tell me, does this work on unruly kitchen staff too? Toodle pips and purrs Erin Kitchen staff are a bit different from kittens. I recommend sitting on them, but the only thing it teaches […]

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Ask Max Monday: Doomed. DOOMED!

Ask Max Monday: Doomed. DOOMED!

Max….so our mom keeps taking the kittens places (and bringing her back). Then she went and bought…a STROLLER for her. What is wrong with those two?? I’ve had to think long and hard about this, because at one time the Woman also bought a stroller with the intent of taking Buddah and me on walks […]

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Ask Max Monday: Looks Like Everyone Was Busy This Week

Ask Max Monday: Looks Like Everyone Was Busy This Week

There really weren’t enough questions this week (one) and the Woman was all OOOOHHHH LET’S WATCH THE OSCARS INSTEAD OF WORKING last night, so here we are. I was pretty much like this all evening, staring at the Woman, trying to get her to do anything other than watch people celebrate movies that she didn’t […]

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Ask Max Monday: Let’s ALL play “People Freakout!”

Ask Max Monday: Let’s ALL play “People Freakout!”

Wait, I can get genital acne? Should I find a blog post outlining a cure? Yes. Yes, you should. Find it, then summarize it, and submit it to every freaking address that seems remotely like a place that runs articles on genital acne. Like, dog blogs. Apparently, pet blogs are the place to submit things. […]

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Ask Max Monday: Look, I just work here…

Ask Max Monday: Look, I just work here…

Dear blog owner, I just HAPPENED to run across your blog and I think it’s OH SO NEAT and I wanted to write to you and heap tons of FAKE PRAISE on it so that I can convince you to write me back and confirm that this is a real email address. I’m going to […]

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Ask Max Monday: Ok, She’s Better

Ask Max Monday: Ok, She’s Better

Deer Na  Dude Youse know mine little sisfur Sugar well most of de tyme wez gud. But lately she uz acting like a poop head  Iz started getting acne bumps and de mama drags me to de Vet to get dem check out and popped sum tymes  When I getz home already feeling shitty fur […]

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Ask Max Monday: The Unedition

Ask Max Monday: The Unedition

Doods, the Woman is not feeling well, so I’m just propped up here purring, trying to make her feel better. We’ll be back next week, so leave a question or email it, and hopefully she can help me type up the answers. Got a question for me? You can leave it in the comments below, […]

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