Ask Max Monday

Oh wise Max, I have a question. What are your favorite Fancy Feast flavors?

My humans are starting to bring me Fancy Feast offerings instead of the free range artisanal crap they’ve been dragging in since my beloved Nutro Max Cat went away.

I horked up half a can of some tuna and salmon garbage last night. You’d have been proud of me, Max. Right in the middle of the hallway carpet!

What flavors of Fancy Feast should I demand? I’ve tried something with chicken guts and it was really good. What are your favs?

Keep on ticking, Max!


Oh, I think the better question would be which ones don’t I like because that takes less time to answer. I’m not a fan of salmon, so I don’t eat that one (though I do enjoy the salmon & shrimp, go figure.) You can’t go wrong with the classic pates, like tender beef or chicken feast, and the fish & shrimp is amazing! It’s like it expands once it’s out of the can and there’s A LOT of food there, tasty fish and really big shrimp chunks.

I mostly get the pate flavors and don’t know much about the ones with gravy. The Woman has never liked giving me those because there’s not enough bulk in them and I get hungry faster, but this week she bought me some of the gravy lovers beef and a can of the chicken one to see if I liked either of them. And the gravy is pretty tasty! I didn’t eat much of the meat part but licking up that gravy was awesome.

I don’t like the one that’s beef liver and chicken. In fact, I don’t like any of them with liver. But try all the others, they’re pretty tasty! And the bonus: the stabby person told the Woman that Fancy Feast is not the junk food she’d been led to believe. Though at this point it wouldn’t matter. I get what I want, as long as she can figure out what that is.

= = =

Hay, Max, I know you gots a dot on your nose but did you always have that? I gots a new one and my mom is worried about it.

Well, I’ve always had the little diamond shaped mark under my nose, but the dot didn’t appear until I was almost 4 years old. In fact, the Woman thought I’d gotten into her Sharpies somehow and given myself a little tattoo, so she tried to scrub it off.

Imagine her surprise when it didn’t go anywhere. That might have been the first time I growled at her.

We get marks, just like people do. She did ask the stabby guy, who likened it to a freckle. I mean, your mom should get it looked at to be sure, but she doesn’t need to panic. Chances are, it’s just a beauty mark. Though mine is totally a tattoo. Chicks dig tattoos. Right?

= = =

How ya doin’ bud? I saw on your Woman’s FB yesterday you weren’t eating. Please eat.

Dood…today was a better day and I ate well. Yesterday was just one of the bad days, which she hates because she can’t control it and she wants me to be well, but I have one or two of those every week. I started coming around last night and asked for food twice, and I licked at it a little bit. By this morning, I was hungry again and ate all my steak bites plus all my breakfast. For the rest of the day I nibbled on food and got her to open 3 different cans for me, then ate half my evening steak snack.

And dood, just now I devoured my half of the Fancy Feast Medleys can she opened for us. Normally my 9pm snack is the last one of the day, but she promised that if I asked before she goes to bed, she’d get me more to eat.

This is just how life is right now. Some days I eat really well, others I nibble, and the bad days I just don’t feel like eating at all.

Today was a good day.

Not gonna lie and say I’m great because I’m not. But I’m hanging in there, and as long as I have more good days than bad, we’re not worrying too much.

Oh! And I got a new fountain today! That was AWESOME!

= = =

If you have questions, leave them in the comments or in email and I’ll get to them next week.

6 thoughts on “Ask Max Monday: EAT ALL THE FANCY FEASTS!

  1. Dude, you get so much choice. Around here the food sucks — all Brussels sprouts and turnips! OK maybe I exaggerate a bit, but that’s how it seems. Mice and sparrow all the way! OK, on a more serious note, and in line with asking the king of cat literature, what do you think I need to do to get this whole mask thing sorted out? Mrs H goes out with one and comes back with another ten. Seems like everyone and thing has to have a mask. Apparently, I need to have one before I chase the mice! In fact, Mrs H said I should only chase mice at a distance, and use paw sanitiser before and after I make bare my teeth at them! I think flossing and a bit of mouthwash is enough!

    What would you do?

    PS. Have you any tips on how to deal with surplus mice in lockdown situation?

  2. Here’s a hint about any of the canned foods with gravy or sauce, put them in the food processor until they look almost like the pate. It means eating more instead of just licking off the gravy, gets more calories into the cat.

  3. Max, this is Gandalf, I have a huge complaint about my human! After she catnapped me off the street (OK, the clowder and the peepul out there were nasty), she was feeding me plenty. I was even starting to like my human, and permitted her to pet me since it does her so much good. I got much much stronger and more umm robust! Then she fed me less. Much less. She says she’s worried about diabetes, but I don’t know what that is, so I know it doesn’t affect me.

    To make things worse, now That Cat Angel suddenly got sick with kidneys and she’s eating lots of special gushy food, and I don’t get any of it. Shouldn’t Angel just have less kidneys if she got sick on them?

    My human calls me a “perfect gentleman” but shouldn’t a robust perfect gentleman be fed more?

    1. Max, this is frail, weak, elderly princess Angel. That rough, rude outsider is complaining about my gushyfood? He gets gushyfood of his own . . . he should just stop bugging me and let me eat my gushyfood in peace! Tell him to let me eat my gushies in peace, and drink my water in peace, and snuggle with my human in peace. It’s not like he wants to snuggle (and I won’t let him!).

  4. My clowder recommends Fancy Feast Savory Centers. I will eat anything, but our geezers (oops I mean wise elders) really like these flavors and they are very soft and wet. The Mom says they are like “cherry cordial chocolates” whatever that is, it sounds nasty but these are not nasty! You might like them.

  5. Max, around here, none of the cats like beef or chicken anything, so we are stuck with fish/shrimp, and turkey.
    If I had it my way, they’d be eating raw food, but The Hubby won’t hear of it! He was a meat-cutter long ago, and all of that training is stuck in his brain.

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