Ask Max Monday

Do I look happy? DO I?

I assure you, I am not happy. I am not happy because the Woman smells like dog. Specifically, TWO dogs. Worse, she smells like dog and has not been home the last three nights, leaving me without a lap to nap upon. She’s come home to feed Buddah and me, but once I’ve had food, she’s had food, I’ve had a lap for like A MINUTE, she leaves and goes back to That Damned Dog Butters and his sister, lady.

Oh, and this. THIS!

That’s MY lap that Lady is sleeping on. I own those legs. That’s supposed to be MY spot, where I watch TV from, and where I curl up and snooze, occasionally headbutting the Woman’s face (doods, for real, I got her so hard last week it made her nose bleed.)

Yes, I know I have the Man, but his lap is not my lap. SHE has my lap. And she’s letting just anyone who feels like it sit on it.

Maybe she’ll be back next week, and can get into my email to see if there are any questions. She better be. So if you have a question, go ahead and ask. Surely SOMEONE will open my email for me.

Got a question for me?

You can leave it in the comments below,

or drop me an email at

5 thoughts on “Ask Max Monday: SHE BETRAYED ME

  1. There has to be a logical reason why she is doing this.

    And my question is, if you could ask people a question, what would it be?

  2. You poor cat, that sort of behavior would not be accepted here.

  3. Oh, Max. You must feel so used. If I were you I’d switch to the man’s lap just to spite her.

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